Charity Sip Blog Hop

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Leather and Love: How Romance Helps Stamp Out Hate

I’m a military spouse and we live overseas. So the trials, travails, and what not of being a military spouse are first and foremost in my mind. With the repeal of DADT, the US military now allows LGBQT people to serve openly. Not that they weren’t serving already, they just had to be ~discreet.

The doors have started to open and I couldn’t be happier. The idea that a LGBTQ partner couldn’t be notified if something happened to their active duty partner boggled my mind and frankly upset me a great deal. Because I could put myself in their shoes – what if it was my husband that was injured in a war zone and it was against regulations to notify me because I was the wrong sex? I mean, just saying that sounds ridiculous. But that’s what DADT meant.

But its repeal is only the first step. LGBTQ people still don’t have access to spousal benefits. They can’t claim their partner as a dependent, their partner doesn’t have access to medical or dental benefits nor do their partner’s kids unless the military member has adopted them, and their partner doesn’t have commissary or exchange privileges.

Now, I know this may sound silly to a lot of you, but imagine this: Your partner has just taken three year orders overseas.

The military won’t spend money to move both of you, you aren’t allowed in base housing, and you cannot shop where all the rest of the Americans shop because you don’t have spousal rights or privileges. If the kids are yours? They can’t attend the American school. And if you get sick? It’s out to the local hospital and you have to pay for it out of your pocket. Which by the way? The take home pay is less for someone without dependents than it is for someone with dependents.

A lot of people would ask, well why doesn’t the military change all that? Because the military is a federal entity and is therefore governed by federal law. And right now? Federal Law is DOMA, the Defense of Marriage Act defining marriage as being between a man and a woman. Until DOMA is gone, there will be no spousal rights for LGBTQ partners.

This is why the NOH8 campaign is so important to me. They are fighting and raising awareness for those rights every single day. I was so thrilled and proud to have my short story be a part of this year’s Charity Sip line because the money goes to support NOH8.

Our country took some major steps in this past election with gay marriage bans being defeated in several states. But it’s not enough. It needs to move up to the federal level because there are LGBTQ people serving in the military and they do have partners but they don’t have benefits.

So check out the Charity Sip line, buy some ebooks because the money goes toward a good cause and hopefully someday soon it WILL reach the federal level and everyone will have the rights they deserve. And hatred will be a thing of the past.

In honor of the Charity Sip Blog Hop I’m offering a giveaway. One random commenter on this post will win a copy of both my Charity Sip story and my most recent Halloween story Mystical Convergency. I will pick the winner on Monday, 11 November 2012. You have until 0800 GMT +1 on Monday, 11 November 2012 (that’s 6 hours ahead of EST for those of you in the US) to leave a comment.

Click on the picture at the top of this post and check out the other authors participating in the Charity Blog Hop!

Happy Blog Hopping!

Blurb: Zeke is a writer, who spends his evenings working as a valet at The Palm Restaurant, and lusting after a particular silver BMW 3 Series and its owner. Josh is the owner of that BMW and the only thing he enjoys about his routine evenings at The Palm is the red-haired valet who parks his car. When Josh is injured in an accident at the restaurant and Zeke is volunteered to drive him home, will their time spent together result in something more – or will Zeke forever remain the nameless valet who parks Josh’s car?

Take one feisty valet, one straight-laced banker, mix in a fancy car and a long drive out to Malibu, and see what pulls up.

You can find it Here or at

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14 responses to “Charity Sip Blog Hop

  1. Can I just sign up for the sequel? I have the other one 😀

    Yay for more releases too

    To this day, I do not understand DADT, but still, yay for progress -even if it IS slow

  2. I think m/m can be a way to make people more empathetic to the situation.


  3. I’m also glad that the bans were repealed in certain states. Now if we could get Wisconsin to repeal DOMA I would be so happy. Quite a few friends could openly commit to each other and get the benefits fitting for a spouse.

    • YES. The more states that repeal the bans the better because eventually one of them will make its way to the Supreme Court and just maybe the Court will see that DOMA is a violation of equal protection and strike it down. Thanks for stopping by!

  4. That would be fine 😀 And yes, more releases, thank you!

    Yes, DADT idek it was Clinton’s way of trying to help, but in a way it only made things that much worse. A baby step is a baby step. There’s so many states that have deemed DOMA unconstitutional it won’t be long before it goes to the Supreme Court.

  5. Love your work and how you make m/m relationships shine. Though generally not my cup of tea, through good writing it is growing on me.

  6. Thank you so much for sharing this with us, Katherine. With the help of education and groups like NOH8, more and more people are starting to understand the real impact these antiquated notions have on people’s lives. We’re making progress, and I look forward to the day where every one has equal rights.

    • You’re welcome. I agree, with education and personalizing the issues it makes it more real for people and really makes them start to think rather than just blowing it off and thinking it doesn’t affect them so why bother. I agree, I look forward to when everyone has equal rights.

  7. ^V^ Jennifer (@Valress)

    I am with you on every part of this. I can’t help but worry for those family members that aren’t able to be notified because of the restrictions placed on the relationship. While I am excited that DADT has been repealed I will be more ecstatic when DOMA goes the same way.

    I love the way you give each character so much depth and emotion, each story is fun and I love the interactions each character deals with.

    • THIS. Exactly this. It kills me to think of someone having to go through a deployment or an IA and have to worry about not finding out on top of all the others worries. I hope the military steps up to the plate when DOMA gets repealed – I sincerely believe it is only a matter of time.

      Awww you’re so sweet. *HUGS* Thanks for stopping by!

  8. A. Catherine Noon

    Hi, Katherine! No need to enter me in the drawing; I just wanted to stop by and say thanks for a great post. I think that LGBT folks serving in the military deserve equal treatment and I’m glad that DADT has been repealed. We’re a step closer to safeguarding the rights of real people, and not some silly talking point of a one-percenter. Thank you for making that point here, and Happy Rememberance Day. I and my family deeply appreciate the sacrifices you and your family make for us. May you and yours be safe.

    • Thanks for taking the time to read and comment. I whole-heartedly agree. Like I said, repealing DADT was a step in the right direction but only a step. It just infuriates me that LGBTQ people can fight and DIE for our country and yet don’t have the same rights given their heterosexual counterparts. It really is absolutely ridiculous.

      And thank you so much! <3333 Have a great week!

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